I have about 10 grey hair in and around the middle of my head. When I say 10, I mean they are the only ones I can see. I don’t know if I have some others hiding somewhere else on my head (sniffles). But lets just talk about the 10 that I know of.
I still remember the first time I became aware of them. A colleague at work joked about spotting one and I could not accept that I had grey hair already (I was 23 back then and had always kept my long hair loose even at work. Yes, I was proud of my hair).
So he plucked it out of my head for me to see it, right before all my other colleagues, and I shrieked out so loud at the sight of it that my boss came running out of his cabin to see what the brouhaha was about. When he was told, he merely smirked and lowered down his own salt and pepper head to my eye-level and told me, ‘See that? I had all this when I was only 18. What’s the big deal? It’s only hair!’
It’s only hair!
It’s only hair!
It’s only hair, dammit!
I’d like to say that the statement stuck with me. I went back home that night and preened at my scalp, and I repeated it like a litany, ‘it’s only hair… it’s only hair’. But then I found one, then two, then three, then four and then five grey hair. By then I was freaking out like a beauty queen freaks out about a pimple on the night of the beauty pageant. I swore at the statement, swore at my boss, and promptly grabbed a pair of scissors and cut them real short, in some cases cutting out the surrounding black ones too, so that when they all started to grow back, those hair would stick out of my head like a porcupine’s needles. Ugh! Talk about a double whammy!
Ever since then I have been periodically trimming those grey hair out of my head, occasionally even enlisting the help of my hapless husband who, as retribution for being employed in a boring chore, was happy enough to chop down entire clumps of good hair too. Their numbers gradually increased from 5 to 10, but by then I had stopped worrying, partially because they were all invisible to outsiders. But a few days ago came the real shocker which prompted me to write this piece down.
I was getting dressed for some occasion when I noticed something silvery around my left temple. Unfortunately for me the light at the time made the hair glint in such a way that it really did look like my hair had grayed around there. Involuntarily, I froze before the mirror.
Oh shit! This was the real deal!
Having grey hair in the middle of the head is one thing but having them at a place where everyone can see them is… a whole new level of growing old. I was officially graying, or so I thought at the time. And I was Diwali-ka-kantar-bomb-wala-shocked (shell shocked, for those who don’t know Hindi)!
I suddenly realized that it had already been a decade since that incident at work. Had it really been 10 years since my 5 grew to 10 to this graying at the temple? Why was I so afraid of only grey hair? I mean, in those 10 years my age has grown too, my skin has become less supple, I have not-the-cute-kind-of-crinkles around my eyes, I’ve developed laugh lines around my mouth, I’ve become slower (god, have I become slower), and worse still, my clothing size has changed too, thrice! Why did none of those make me feel old, but this did?
It’s only hair!
It’s only hair!
But it’s not!
It’s what they represent. The finiteness of our lives and that we’re getting closer to the finish line.
The next day showed me that fate was playing a cruel game with me. One day I feel old, the next day I feel relieved that it was only a play of light. The hair were still dark. But I questioned myself, ‘For how long? There will come a day when all of them will be one or several shades of white or grey. It’s only a matter of time, ol’ girl‘.
Okay, this is going to be pretty depressing for a bit now, but come to think of it, a lot of things in our lives are a matter of time. We all come with only a finite amount of time in our hand. The clock keeps ticking and we keep getting older by the minute. We’re so engrossed in our everyday chores and work that we fail to realise, until moments like these arrive, that we have only that many years left.
I think what shocked me was the realization that age was finally catching up with me. People keep saying ‘age is only a number’. Well, in some ways it is, in some ways it isn’t. To the man who is only 32 or 43 maybe the number of his years will not matter, but to an 80 year old man who’s hooked to an IV in the ICU battling for every breath he takes, age is a HUGE thing. To a doctor who’s treating disaster or trauma cases, age is an important factor to decide which patients can recover and which patients are beyond his help.
Age is not just a number, it’s a reminder that we are mortals. It eggs us onto take reign of our lives and do what matters to us. After one point in our lives we must realise that it isn’t about earning money but spending it too, and that some days, those who we earn for need our time more than our money.
In case you’re wondering what’s the point to this blog-post, it’s this.Β It’s my birthday today. My 32nd to be precise (I’m so daft I’ve been telling folks for the past one year that I was 32 and I believed I was going to be 33 this 2nd of August. Maybe age really is catching up with me). In a decade I will officially be in my middle ages. I have already become an aunty-ji to several kids (including *gasps* teenagers).Β It’s only a matter of time when I become a matron too.
But that incident with the grey hair at the temple taught me a few things –
Aging is inevitable.
I have to learn to live and thrive inspite of it.
It’s just hair, but age is not just a number.
So this birthday, I’ll gift myself the permission to freak out about my hair graying, but at the same time, to teach myself to gear up for obvious eventualities. But the real gift, I’m gifting myself, is that I’m freeing myself of fetters of conforming to things that don’t matter to me anymore, and go for things that I’ve always wanted to do. I’m never going to be 32 again. I’m never going to look like this again, au naturel, sans cakey makeup and weepy mascara.
I’m never going to be this full of energy. So why the heck should I wait for tomorrows when each day I age? I’ll plan, yes; I’ll save, sure, but not dwell on them and never only for my twilight years. I don’t know if I’ll live as long as 40 or 60 or 90. I don’t even know if my 40’s, 60’s or 90’s will have the whole of me anyway. Why not enjoy the whole of me right now, when I still have it with me, untouched by disease or other disabilities?
So,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GIRL!
Eat your cake, twirl in that new dress, take silly selfies and the next day work out, and work your ass off on that one thing you’ve been wanting to accomplish.
‘REPEAT’ on an endless loop.
Oh, and don’t forget to spread smiles, love and cheer. The only things that linger in life are MEMORIES.
Make and gift as many as possible.
P.S. In case you need help with premature graying, Aaj Tak channel gives excellent quack remedies for it. Read about it here.
Copyright Β©2017 Pradita Kapahi.
All rights reserved.
Image Credits: Aaj Tak
Mere b kuch hairs grey hairs Hai vo b tbse JB m 8 year old Tha log tbse same question repeat krk nye tarike SE puchte Hai , koi nya insaan ho to smjh ata Hai mgr vhi purane rishtedar padausi vhi question 6-8 months Baad puche to ajeeb ATA Hai jaise ki unhe yaad hi na ho ki ye bachpan SE grey Hain π
Mere paas ab hr bar ek funny reply hota Hai mujhe Bura v Ni lgta
Btw apko koi aunty nhi bolega Abhi to AP young ho πππ
Aise hi ache ache posts milte rhe yhi asha Hai aur apke janmdivas ki dher sari Shubhkamnaye .
You are looking so pretty in that picture .
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Lol! I think I had read somewhere that everyone has a gray hair or two on their heads as early as the first decade of their lives. Toh tumhare grey hair hona bhi theek hai. Par achha hai you didn’t freak out, jaise maine kiya. Mera reaction toh stupid tha.
Thank you so much for your wishes and compliments. I’ll pray that I keep friends like you close throughout my life π
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Phle sare log use kmi ki trah point out krte the Maine kafi treatment kiye the bachpan Mei after all smjh Aya kmi mere hairs Mei nhi logo k dimag m Hai vo log itne salon SE same baat ko repeat krte nhi thak rhe ab mujhe ye part of life lgta Hai jaise m Kahi jata hu aur koi bol de” are Tere to Baal Abhi SE safed hone lge ”
Aur Mei jawab deta hu “Haan ab budhapa nazdeek Hai ππ”
Ya fir dost ye baat bole to uske liye jawab hota Hai
“Umar nikal gyi tajurba ikttha krne Mei ye Baal aise hi safed nhi hue π”
Friend cum younger brother π
I too feel so.
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Ha ha. Great replies. Aise he bindass rehna. It’s only hair afterall π
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ππkoshish krunga
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Good. Have a great day π π
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Same to u
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Thank you ji π
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ππ
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Lol. I swear I don’t have even a single… Never did I have one πππ… Yes! I am boasting.
Though its true, most of them do have gray hairs at a young age. Nothinh unnatural.
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Yep nothing unnatural but those who do have them at an early age don’t freak out like those who never had them. I used to think I’m one of them. Now I’m not. Time π
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Lol. Gray hair is a symbol of wisdom, though. So be happy…. Wiser girl!
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Yep. If only we could get wiser without tuning older π
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Perceptions….
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Happy bday Pradita! Keep shining, keep smiling π
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Thank you so much Ma’am π π
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Happy birthday dear Pradita! I remember my reaction was pretty much the same when I spotted my first one. But over the years you develop the attitude of, after all it’s only the hair π It’s a sign of growing wisdom ππ.
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Thank you so much Radhika Ma’am. Yes, I need to learn that too. Wisdom is way cooled than gray hair ππ
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a very happy birthday….. and yes a hair is a hair…. but I still wonder why they call white hair a grey one…. but still its only a hair…..
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That’s so true. It’s only hair. It’ll grow,fall off and regrow. Why the fuss. And yes even I wonder why it’s called a gray hair. English is funny π
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Happy birthday!!!!! And be happy, I couldn’t spot a gray hair in that picture.
This article was so beautiful
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You couldn’t spot it because it’s in the middle of my head, hidden. π
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Shush! Enjoy the compliment for a moment!!! ππ
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π π π π aye aye captain π
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Wishes galore on your special day and an amazing year ahead!
Lovely and thoughtful post.
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Thanks a lot for your kind wishes Ma’am π π π
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You are very welcome π
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ππ
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I can relate to this sooo much…I spotted my first grey hair when i was around 25…and i wept….like literally….i wept and wept and wept like a little girl… but yeah as long as its not visible to the outside world I’m cool with it π happy birthday in advance π π
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Lol! I came close to that reaction too when I noticed them the first time. So far they’re still invisible. But here will be a day when they do become visible. Then what? So this post is my reminder and reinforcement that I need to prepare while not letting my inner child go. Thank you for your wishes π π π
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Happy Birthday Madam…
I also had a grey hair during my college time. But thode thode karke wo sab chale gaye… phir vapis hi nahi aaye. bas tabse wo jagah mene khali hi rakhi hai… Phir hair style chage kar liya…
My wife is also so much cautious about her grey hair. If she can find any single visible, she immediately plan to make it color. Some time she gave me a task to find a grey hair in the middle of her head, but every time I failed and she became angry. ” Ek Baal nahi dhundh shakte, to phir shaadi kyu ki ? ”
Life is more colorful than our gray hair. People now a days color their hair, but forget to add colors to their life.
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You wife has the right dialog! π I too say that to my husband when he fails to cut the Grey hair and only cuts the black ones. But you’re right, our lives are more colorful than our hair. Why bicker about it π Thank you for your kind wishes π π
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Grey is cool π when is your birthday
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Oh that it is. π it’s today Sangbad.
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πmake a wish & blow…
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Made a wish and blew away ππ
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Belated happy wala budday wish, Pradita. Oh! My gosh! I love my hair loads and imagine five years back, I saw grey streak and nearly jumped in front of the mirror. It’s the reason why I am coloring my hair since the past four years as the grey hair is expanding everywhere. The worse is the beard becoming grey. I have stopped thinking about aging now since it becomes a battle in the mind that can make you feel bad. I am in this stage now.
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Oh pretty soon I think I’ll be in the same stage as well. The birthday wishes I’ll accept today itself because it’s today. So, thank you so much. My husband colors his hair too and he swears its led to more Grey hair. Maybe you should give coloring a pause. Or better still, do what you said, stop thinking about it π
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Oh woah! Hapy wala budday and i am so right. Grey hair is so scary yaa and need to think about it.
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Thanks again. Yes you’re right. Graying hair is scary but kya karein, pakne toh hai hee π
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Happy Birthday Pradita. Here is to many more grey hair and many more wonderful posts.
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Thank you so much for your good wishes π π π
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Happy birthday dear…wish you to have many more lucky hairs π
(Grey hair=lucky hair)
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Thanks a lot Akhila πππ
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Happywala birrday Pradita…
I too have a bunch of shiny white hair rite in the front.. you know just where your mane ends.. and everyday in my attempt to hide them they keep making embarrassing guest appearances… much to my dismay i just simply hide them back.. after all they are only hair.. ab kya hi bole..
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Lol! Hiding them is all we can do, or clipping them like I do. But then you have a cactus growing on your head so I wont recommend it. π thank you so much for your wishes π π
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oh no i don’t clip them.. because then they start shooting out pointing out their glee in growing back and making those appearances again..
So whats special birthday girl..?
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Lol. So true. I never learn though. π€£ Nothing special. Just getting to put my feet up and relaxing is a celebration all by itself. Playing Ning to do just that π
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Dont worry Pradita, you will be like Ajith Kumar in your 40s, More the salt, the better you ll look… 40 % of my hair is greyed already! Am not even 30 :P… Anyways Wishing you a salty birthday! π
You know what, Einsteins have grey hairs for a reason π
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Ah! You’ve made me so happy by equating me with the two stalwarts of their respective fields. Thank you so much π π π
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ππ»ππ»ππ
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Happy wala b’day dear! I think even in this post you have some confusion about your age. You say in the earlier part that you were 23, 10 years ago. And today is your 32nd b’day. Well,something’s amiss.
Nevertheless, I can empathise with you when you say you freaked out. It is natural. And this post too has a very informal, natural feel to it, almost as if you are talking with someone. Kudos!
As for grey hair, I don’t fret over it. I think all stages of life are natural, and we must enjoy/cherish each one of them, all the ones that we live to see. After all, who knows?
Your epiphany is very good as well, living Today the best you can. And not to flatter, but that pic doesn’t look like that of a 32/33-year old, more like mid-20s. Credit to your workout/healthy lifestyle.
Once again, wish you a very happy b’day.
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Thanks a lot RAY π yes, you’re right about the confusion. It’ll sound like a lame excuse, but up until I had almost published the post I believed I was 33, no really! And then at the last minute, I decided I should probably check on that figure. Turns out I’m year younger π€£ So that means I forgot to edit it π€¦ββοΈ
Anyhow… You haven’t written if you have grey or not. If you don’t then you can’t know the horror π And if you do ill accept your empathy.
Oh and thank you for flattering this old girl πππ
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That is a facepalm situation. πππ Still, congratulations on being able to cut down a year. You are lucky. Some of us aren’t able to do that. ππ
I don’t think I have grey hair, but I have seen how people who have them feel and behave. Maybe there was a wrong word usage by me. Let me change empathy to sympathy. I guess you’d be comfortable with that. ππ
Flattering, well, I told the honest-to-God truth!
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Thank you Sir, for the congratulations and the ‘sympathy’ now. Goodness, it’s fun sparring with you over semantics π€£ I don’t say that to many people, so kudos to you π
OK, flattery or not, the compliment was well received. βοΈ
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You’re very welcome, ma’am.
I’ll take those kudos too (in short supply). I had to look up ‘semantics’ in the dictionary. Couldn’t place the meaning. Fun sparring with me? Yay!!!!
ππ
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πππ glad it made you happy. Who knew sparring could π
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Many many happy returns of the day lovely lady.π
I can understand how it feels to find grey threads above there. I’m 26 and have many (hide by coloring )π
But it’s only hair!! So, enjoy their beauty and live a scintillating life ahead.
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You’re so right. It’s just hair. As for the age, I think I should just start by remembering just how old I actually am and not make myself age more π€£ Thanks for your wishes π
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Look, today you are a new born.
Live your life , enjoy every moment, cry, laugh, let the laughing lines glorify your beauty and keep that cuty picture smile stuck to your face always.
You are most welcome my dear.
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Awwwwww. Thank you so much for the encouragement π ππ
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πππ
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Happy birthday dear, you’re 32 and still young.. π
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Thanks a lot Savio πππ
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..and yes “Itβs only hair!” at least they’re turning color, some of us don’t have any hair left really ππππ holding on to what’s remaining. Hair, less hair, white hair or No hair at all-Life has to go on…
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Whoa! That almost an epiphany. Like a glad half full or half empty. You just gave me so much encouragement, you have no idea!
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anything to cheer up the ‘still pretty-and-young-one’
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Awwwwww. Thanks a lot π π
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Happy Birthday dear Pradita
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Thanks a lot Daneel π π
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Welcome Pradita, God bless you
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Thanks again π
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Welcome
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Happy Birthday (belated) Pradita! I have not come across many females who accept grey hair as part of their lives! I admire your attitude towards life and yourself! Great going…
Wishing you a great year ahead!
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Hi and thank you so much for your wishes π If you go back to the post you’ll see that I’m still having trouble with accepting my Grey hair, but yes, I’ll say this – I’m a lot calmer since that day π Thanks again π
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i did read in your post that you have come to terms with the reality…that’s why I mentioned it in my last comment. Anyways, I guess its not just about getting grey/white hair that hits you…its more about the comments and treatment from friends/family. I’m sure its much easier to accept it on a personal level but the attitude of people….leaves a big question mark!
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Apologies! I didn’t realise you must have been referring to my acceptance. And you’re right, sometimes it’s more difficult when others start pointing it out to you. But in my case since they’re hidden only a few folks know of it. Which means it’s got mostly to do with how I take it. But yeah, I’ve seen people poking fun at others for having Grey hair, so I know what you mean π
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Then you are lucky…that you are able to dodge it. I think it’s how humansβ are wired.
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That’s right. π
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Great Read!
Here, check this out
https://theindianindiehead.wordpress.com/2017/08/06/theriseofindianindie/
The Indianindiehead finally writes about Indian Indie. Find out the journey and artists that shaped Indian indie music!
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Thanks a lot. I’;; definitely check out your post shortly. Keep visiting π
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Belated happy birthday. I guess it’s only a matter of time before I start panicking about grey hairs. That was a great post. Sorry I was MIA for a while. My PG classes started and I’ve been busy the last couple of months. But I’m back now. I’ve missed you, darling. ππ
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Babe, don’t be sorry about it. Lifes more important. Thank you so much for your wishes. I can honestly say that you’re one of the people I always look forward to hearing from π€π
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That made my day! I can say that same about you too. Thanks for all the love and support. π€ππ
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You’re most welcome π ππ€π
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πππ
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Wow!!A very very belated Happy Birthday to an amazing blogger.
And it’s really inspiring how it ended, how you finally realised a grey aint gonna be a trouble, when you want to live life to the fullest.
Lots of luck to you Prads!!
Keep blazing and stay amazing…..ππ
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Thanks a lot my girl! How have you been? Heading over to your blog now to read what you’ve cooked up ππ
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Oouch
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π π π So sorry again
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Arre its okay!!! π
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ππππ I hope you got a ping back about my reblog of your post. Thanks for letting me post it.
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Yea, I did. I was reading it. I couldn’t have described it this well, it was the moral of the story……
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So sorry…. I thought you were someone else, a girl I know! Didn’t realise its The Shaggy π€£π€£π€£ Mera popat ho gaya. Anyway heading now to your site.
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Ooow!! Never mind. This happened with me as well. Mistook a guy for a girl. We had a pretty flirtatious chat. Oh that’s embarrassing!!!
ππ
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LOL!!! Really? But why did that guy let you go on? Unless he was gay…
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He was having fun, although the possibility of him being gay can’t be ruled out
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π€£π€£π€£π€£ poor you.
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Since then, I don’t talk to strangers
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